I've learned a lot this year. More so about myself than anything else, really. One of the things I learned this year is just how much of a loner I can be. And I learned it in an unlikely place.
Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a fairly social guy, so it might come as somewhat of a surprise to find out that I consider myself a loner. Let me make something clear. I love people. And I love loving people. I'm comfortable in a crowd, but the point I'm trying to make is that I'm just as comfortable on my own. I'm fine with sitting in a room full of people, absorbed in my thoughts, in my own little world. I guess I should have extrapolated from the fact that I spend hours a day in my room either asleep or just cruising around on the internet. I'll gladly jump in if a bunch of people are going to Dutch's for dinner or are going to a Stars game, but I'm just as happy on my own.
I discovered this in a strange way. I actually discovered it in class. After all our quizzes, Dr. Dan would read our answers out loud, and we would have to guess who wrote it. Spoiler alert: it's always Kacey. Anyway, a few quizzes in I realized I only knew about four or five people's names. And at the end of the semester, on the last day of class, I realized I still only knew a handful of names. And I certainly didn't know anyone I hadn't known at the beginning of the semester.
That startled me because it put in perspective two things about me. One, I didn't make an effort to get to know these people. And two, I really am a loner. I learned something about myself I'm not sure I liked. I'm still trying to figure out how to handle that.
Sunday, May 4, 2014
"Hey, Scotty... Jesus, man"
My faith is the most important thing in my life, and if I tried to give an account of my entire walk with the Lord I'd be at this computer till classes started in August. I want to focus on one experience and what I learned from it.
Every Sunday I go to church with a guy named Andrew, who went to TCU and graduated a few years ago. He now works for some engineering company or something here in Fort Worth. Anyway, we've taken to talking about the sermons on the car rides back to campus, and we've had some great talks, but one stands out. We were talking about something called the Doctrine of License, which basically says that since Jesus died for all my sins on the cross I can do whatever I want in this life and still go to heaven when I die. It's a highly dangerous road to travel because if you buy into this doctrine chances are you never believed in Jesus in the first place. But that's not what I'm getting at.
I realized something about myself that I had been trying to avoid confronting for a long time. I realized that I was still trying to earn my way into heaven. I'm a textbook Pharisee. I believed that if I did enough Christian things, I could earn God's approval. Basically, I tried to control my own salvation. This made me realize just how much of a control freak I actually am. I'm terrified of letting go and trusting God for my salvation because I'm afraid that it I let go, if I stop trying, then I won't have done enough and there will be no going back.
This led me to realize how small a view of the cross I actually had, and I've grown closer to God because of that encounter. I know it's super personal, but I'm running on little sleep, so deal with it.
Every Sunday I go to church with a guy named Andrew, who went to TCU and graduated a few years ago. He now works for some engineering company or something here in Fort Worth. Anyway, we've taken to talking about the sermons on the car rides back to campus, and we've had some great talks, but one stands out. We were talking about something called the Doctrine of License, which basically says that since Jesus died for all my sins on the cross I can do whatever I want in this life and still go to heaven when I die. It's a highly dangerous road to travel because if you buy into this doctrine chances are you never believed in Jesus in the first place. But that's not what I'm getting at.
I realized something about myself that I had been trying to avoid confronting for a long time. I realized that I was still trying to earn my way into heaven. I'm a textbook Pharisee. I believed that if I did enough Christian things, I could earn God's approval. Basically, I tried to control my own salvation. This made me realize just how much of a control freak I actually am. I'm terrified of letting go and trusting God for my salvation because I'm afraid that it I let go, if I stop trying, then I won't have done enough and there will be no going back.
This led me to realize how small a view of the cross I actually had, and I've grown closer to God because of that encounter. I know it's super personal, but I'm running on little sleep, so deal with it.
Art History
I had a fantastic art history teacher in high school. He was this old guy named Jim Russell, and he had been teaching at MUS for something like 40+ years. He was the one who ignited my passion for art history. Ok, my trip to Italy in 8th grade ignited the passion, but Mr, Russell reignited the long-smoldering coals of my passion for art history.
Last semester I took a class called Animals in Art, which looked at the depictions of different animals in different time periods of art. But the class I took this semester was called British Art: Medieval to Modern. It was one of the most eye opening classes I've taken. My high school art history course was a basic survey course, going over all the major time periods and works. And the Animals in Art class was similar. But Brit Art was the first class I'd taken that dealt specifically with a certain culture and looked at the entire history of its art.
I was astounded by not only the sheer number of works but of the history within them. I guess I hadn't really considered that fact that a hundred years is a long time, and a lot can happen, historically speaking. The class gave me a greater appreciation for British history and history in general. There is a lot more to the human story than just the major events we hear and learn about. The life story of a person in the most obscure portrait painting can be just as important as a war-winning battle.
Last semester I took a class called Animals in Art, which looked at the depictions of different animals in different time periods of art. But the class I took this semester was called British Art: Medieval to Modern. It was one of the most eye opening classes I've taken. My high school art history course was a basic survey course, going over all the major time periods and works. And the Animals in Art class was similar. But Brit Art was the first class I'd taken that dealt specifically with a certain culture and looked at the entire history of its art.
I was astounded by not only the sheer number of works but of the history within them. I guess I hadn't really considered that fact that a hundred years is a long time, and a lot can happen, historically speaking. The class gave me a greater appreciation for British history and history in general. There is a lot more to the human story than just the major events we hear and learn about. The life story of a person in the most obscure portrait painting can be just as important as a war-winning battle.
Uncontrollable laughter pt. 2
If you haven't gone to Czech Stop, you need to go tonight. If you don't know what it is, let me enlighten you. Czech Stop is this tiny little gas station about an hour and a half south of us in the small town of West, TX, near where that plant blew up or whatever happened a while back. What's so great about it isn't the gas prices, it's the gas station food. They have these amazing pastry things called kolaches, and they defy explanation. They're sort of like danishes, but not as sweet, and better. Anyway, it's something of a tradition to make the 3+ hour road trip to Czech Stop in the middle of the night, preferably the night before a major exam. So that's exactly what Wyatt, Andrew O'Brien, and I did last semester.
Now when you're on a three hour road trip, you're not going to sit in silence. For the first half of the leg down there we played music, then we talked about which power you would have if you had to choose between air bending, water bending, earth bending, or fire bending. I said water bending, but it all depends on how fine a control we're talking here. I mean, do I have control of water at the molecular level? The droplet level? The snowball level? And how far do my powers extend? As far as I can see? Do I have to be touching the water? This isn't a simple question.
Then we turned to one of my favorite games, Make It Or Break It. The idea behind Make It Or Break It is that we are all terrible, shallow people. It goes like this. Say you're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way. But she ____________. Fill in the blank with some flaw, and everyone playing has to decide whether they will stay in the relationship (make it) or dump her (break it). For example: You're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but once a week, for fifteen minutes, she tries her absolute hardest to kill you. Make it or break it? Or you're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but she makes you switch to Boost Mobile. Make it or break it? Obviously this game can get really complicated really fast. There are some that are super long and complex, but I won't go into them because they're kind of inappropro.
So we were playing Make It Or Break It, and one of us came up with one that we will aways remember. I don;t remember who said it, but it went like this: You're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but when she has an orgasm she screams like the Nazgul from Lord of the Rings. Make it or break it? That alone was enough to get us laughing harder than we had ever laughed, but then someone looked up a soundbite of a Nazgul screaming. (Here's a clip of a Nazgul screaming in case you've never seen the movies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rtI86rgZ9I). I can honestly say that it was the funniest thing that has ever happened to me. I really don't know how Andrew's car stayed on the road.
But the laughing is only half the story. You see, this incident happened a short time after BYX Big/Little reveal, and I had only just learned that Andrew was my big. This was the first road trip we had ben on as big and little, and it was a great bonding experience for the both of us. At least, I know it was for me. We have become really close since then, and I attribute a lot of that to the fact that our relationship "began" with laughter.
Now when you're on a three hour road trip, you're not going to sit in silence. For the first half of the leg down there we played music, then we talked about which power you would have if you had to choose between air bending, water bending, earth bending, or fire bending. I said water bending, but it all depends on how fine a control we're talking here. I mean, do I have control of water at the molecular level? The droplet level? The snowball level? And how far do my powers extend? As far as I can see? Do I have to be touching the water? This isn't a simple question.
Then we turned to one of my favorite games, Make It Or Break It. The idea behind Make It Or Break It is that we are all terrible, shallow people. It goes like this. Say you're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way. But she ____________. Fill in the blank with some flaw, and everyone playing has to decide whether they will stay in the relationship (make it) or dump her (break it). For example: You're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but once a week, for fifteen minutes, she tries her absolute hardest to kill you. Make it or break it? Or you're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but she makes you switch to Boost Mobile. Make it or break it? Obviously this game can get really complicated really fast. There are some that are super long and complex, but I won't go into them because they're kind of inappropro.
So we were playing Make It Or Break It, and one of us came up with one that we will aways remember. I don;t remember who said it, but it went like this: You're dating a girl, and she's perfect in every way, but when she has an orgasm she screams like the Nazgul from Lord of the Rings. Make it or break it? That alone was enough to get us laughing harder than we had ever laughed, but then someone looked up a soundbite of a Nazgul screaming. (Here's a clip of a Nazgul screaming in case you've never seen the movies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rtI86rgZ9I). I can honestly say that it was the funniest thing that has ever happened to me. I really don't know how Andrew's car stayed on the road.
But the laughing is only half the story. You see, this incident happened a short time after BYX Big/Little reveal, and I had only just learned that Andrew was my big. This was the first road trip we had ben on as big and little, and it was a great bonding experience for the both of us. At least, I know it was for me. We have become really close since then, and I attribute a lot of that to the fact that our relationship "began" with laughter.
The complexities of humor
My life, and most of my social interactions, as best I can determine, has been a series of jokes and laughs. When I meet people, I instinctively shy away from the stiff formalities and pleasantries of "accepted" social behavior. Not to say that I intentionally try to be inappropriate, but I do like to challenge social norms and the expected patterns of behavior. I find them stifling. I don't like to be told how to behave. I've come to realize that's why I hate competitive swimming. When I'm in the water, I'm free. I can go wherever I want in the pool, however I want to get there. And when someone tells me I have to swim a certain way, in a certain direction, for a certain distance, my entire being rejects the idea. Also, I can't dive.
But back to what I was saying. When I meet people, I try to project a certain image of myself. I want to be someone you don't have to take too seriously, because, after all, I hardly take myself seriously anyway. But whenever I violate these social conventions when I'm around people, especially people I've just met, they tend to laugh. And that's curious because I'm not trying to be funny. The things I do and say aren't funny in and of themselves. And that gets me wondering: why do people laugh at unfunny things? Think about it. People laugh in awkward situations, when they don't know what else to say. People laugh when they're really happy, even though the situation itself isn't necessarily funny.
It only follows then that laughter and humor are not necessarily related. So what makes something funny. According to our textbook, there are the Relief Theory, Incongruity Theory, and Superiority Theory. But I think these theories are dumb. First of all, I don't think there's a fixed scientific definition of humor, that if something meets these criteria then it's funny. But I do think most humor is just variations on the same thing. In my experience, confirmed by my readings in class, something is funny if it's unexpected. This would explain all the humor that falls under the supposed category of "Incongruity". Humor is the study of the unexpected. When a drunk walks into a wall, it's not funny because we feel superior to that person. It's funny because his behavior conflicts with normal human behavior of not walking into walls. And don't get me started on the Relief Theory. It might explain why we laugh at times, but it doesn't mean something's funny.
Personally, I loved learning about humor since it's such a big part of my life. I was glad to know that my own musings on the subject have been much more extensively mused on. If I live my life making jokes, isn't it important to know why my audience laughs?
But back to what I was saying. When I meet people, I try to project a certain image of myself. I want to be someone you don't have to take too seriously, because, after all, I hardly take myself seriously anyway. But whenever I violate these social conventions when I'm around people, especially people I've just met, they tend to laugh. And that's curious because I'm not trying to be funny. The things I do and say aren't funny in and of themselves. And that gets me wondering: why do people laugh at unfunny things? Think about it. People laugh in awkward situations, when they don't know what else to say. People laugh when they're really happy, even though the situation itself isn't necessarily funny.
It only follows then that laughter and humor are not necessarily related. So what makes something funny. According to our textbook, there are the Relief Theory, Incongruity Theory, and Superiority Theory. But I think these theories are dumb. First of all, I don't think there's a fixed scientific definition of humor, that if something meets these criteria then it's funny. But I do think most humor is just variations on the same thing. In my experience, confirmed by my readings in class, something is funny if it's unexpected. This would explain all the humor that falls under the supposed category of "Incongruity". Humor is the study of the unexpected. When a drunk walks into a wall, it's not funny because we feel superior to that person. It's funny because his behavior conflicts with normal human behavior of not walking into walls. And don't get me started on the Relief Theory. It might explain why we laugh at times, but it doesn't mean something's funny.
Personally, I loved learning about humor since it's such a big part of my life. I was glad to know that my own musings on the subject have been much more extensively mused on. If I live my life making jokes, isn't it important to know why my audience laughs?
My conversation with Crichelle Brice
So back in March, Wyatt, Austin, and I did a presentation on British humor. Wyatt and Austin interviewed Crichelle, and I did some research on the internet. So I never got the chance to sit down with an actual English person and talk with them about their humor. And, quite frankly, I have already forgotten most of what we talked about. And I felt I missed out on a good opportunity because I love British comedies like Monty Python or those old comedies they show late at night on PBS like Keeping Up Appearances or As Time Goes By.
So I reached out to Crichelle and sat down with her. Actually, I was lying in bed, and I don't know where she was; it was phone interview. So I asked her about what made something funny back home, and she said that much of English humor is dry or sarcastic. She told me that it is in fact so heavily sarcastic that most foreigners think it's plain rude and mean. There is also a big element of self-depreciation, and that making fun of yourself can be seen as funny.
When I asked her about her experience in the States she said that she didn't find American humor necessarily funny or not. It depended on who was telling the joke. She said that she doesn't find American humor that funny unless it's pretty intelligent. She said it's not as subtle. It's more upfront and obvious, and so you don;thane to think about it as much, which she said wasn't as fun. She also pointed out that an American probably wouldn't understand when she was joking.
This whole experience got me thinking. I said in my earlier post that I didn't believe that one could give a blanket definition to the comedic preferences of an entire culture, and in some ways that's probably true. But I'd like to amend my earlier statement to say that you probably couldn't do that to America. I think we're just too big, and it's probably also a cultural thing. We have a population around 300 million people, whereas the countries from out Humor Around the World presentations only had populations in the tens of millions if not the plain-old millions. That's just too many opinions. I also said it's probably a cultural thing. We Americans pride ourselves on freedom of speech, and I think that extends to humor too. We like being able to find whatever we want funny, and the idea that there's a single unifying definition of humor for all of us goes against our notion of individuality and freedom.
Personally, I think that's awesome, that we're the exception to the rule. But more importantly, it means that I can be challenged by what I and other people think are funny. I can grow in my understanding of humor and the human condition. Or something like that
So I reached out to Crichelle and sat down with her. Actually, I was lying in bed, and I don't know where she was; it was phone interview. So I asked her about what made something funny back home, and she said that much of English humor is dry or sarcastic. She told me that it is in fact so heavily sarcastic that most foreigners think it's plain rude and mean. There is also a big element of self-depreciation, and that making fun of yourself can be seen as funny.
When I asked her about her experience in the States she said that she didn't find American humor necessarily funny or not. It depended on who was telling the joke. She said that she doesn't find American humor that funny unless it's pretty intelligent. She said it's not as subtle. It's more upfront and obvious, and so you don;thane to think about it as much, which she said wasn't as fun. She also pointed out that an American probably wouldn't understand when she was joking.
This whole experience got me thinking. I said in my earlier post that I didn't believe that one could give a blanket definition to the comedic preferences of an entire culture, and in some ways that's probably true. But I'd like to amend my earlier statement to say that you probably couldn't do that to America. I think we're just too big, and it's probably also a cultural thing. We have a population around 300 million people, whereas the countries from out Humor Around the World presentations only had populations in the tens of millions if not the plain-old millions. That's just too many opinions. I also said it's probably a cultural thing. We Americans pride ourselves on freedom of speech, and I think that extends to humor too. We like being able to find whatever we want funny, and the idea that there's a single unifying definition of humor for all of us goes against our notion of individuality and freedom.
Personally, I think that's awesome, that we're the exception to the rule. But more importantly, it means that I can be challenged by what I and other people think are funny. I can grow in my understanding of humor and the human condition. Or something like that
Saturday, May 3, 2014
Uncontrollable Laughter pt. 1
I was browsing Youtube earlier and I came across a video called O Fortuna Misheard Lyrics. 30 seconds into the video I was laughing with complete abandon. I was openly weeping it was so funny. If you've never heard the song (although I'm sure you have, you just may not know it's name), it's a medieval Latin poem addressed to the character of fortune or luck. The video is part of a meme culture called misheard lyrics. Basically, you take a song in another language and write down the English words it sounds like the song is saying. For example:
O fortuna, velut luna (O fortune, just as the moon) Gopher tuna, bring more tuna
Satur variabilis (Full of change) --> Statue of big dog with fleas
Semper crisis (Always waxing) Some men like cheese
Aut decrescis (Or waning) Hot temperate cheese
You see the comedic potential. My favorite line is on the huge sudden crescendo where the choir is actually singing "Sors salutis et vir tutis" (Fate is against me in health) but the lyrics on the video are "Salsa cookies, windmill cookies".
Part of what makes the video so great is the animations that go along with it. The characters actually look like they're singing the misheard lyrics, which makes the video even funnier. But another part of the humor comes from the fact that O Fortuna is such an epic song, especially when sung by a full choir, and the idea that an entire choir would be belting out the line "Salsa cookies", combined with the animated character from the video, dissolves me into fits of giggles.
Looking back, this video has been exactly what I needed because it got me focused back on schoolwork after I'd been messing around on the internet too long. I blogged about the video, and now I'm going to work on other stuff I desperately need to get done. Other than that, though, I can thing of no other redeeming value this video possesses.
Here's the link if you want to watch it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIwrgAnx6Q8
O fortuna, velut luna (O fortune, just as the moon) Gopher tuna, bring more tuna
Satur variabilis (Full of change) --> Statue of big dog with fleas
Semper crisis (Always waxing) Some men like cheese
Aut decrescis (Or waning) Hot temperate cheese
You see the comedic potential. My favorite line is on the huge sudden crescendo where the choir is actually singing "Sors salutis et vir tutis" (Fate is against me in health) but the lyrics on the video are "Salsa cookies, windmill cookies".
Part of what makes the video so great is the animations that go along with it. The characters actually look like they're singing the misheard lyrics, which makes the video even funnier. But another part of the humor comes from the fact that O Fortuna is such an epic song, especially when sung by a full choir, and the idea that an entire choir would be belting out the line "Salsa cookies", combined with the animated character from the video, dissolves me into fits of giggles.
Looking back, this video has been exactly what I needed because it got me focused back on schoolwork after I'd been messing around on the internet too long. I blogged about the video, and now I'm going to work on other stuff I desperately need to get done. Other than that, though, I can thing of no other redeeming value this video possesses.
Here's the link if you want to watch it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIwrgAnx6Q8
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