One Man Wolfpack

I've learned a lot this year. More so about myself than anything else, really. One of the things I learned this year is just how much of a loner I can be. And I learned it in an unlikely place.

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a fairly social guy, so it might come as somewhat of a surprise to find out that I consider myself a loner. Let me make something clear. I love people. And I love loving people. I'm comfortable in a crowd, but the point I'm trying to make is that I'm just as comfortable on my own. I'm fine with sitting in a room full of people, absorbed in my thoughts, in my own little world. I guess I should have extrapolated from the fact that I spend hours a day in my room either asleep or just cruising around on the internet. I'll gladly jump in if a bunch of people are going to Dutch's for dinner or are going to a Stars game, but I'm just as happy on my own.

I discovered this in a strange way. I actually discovered it in class. After all our quizzes, Dr. Dan would read our answers out loud, and we would have to guess who wrote it. Spoiler alert: it's always Kacey. Anyway, a few quizzes in I realized I only knew about four or five people's names. And at the end of the semester, on the last day of class, I realized I still only knew a handful of names. And I certainly didn't know anyone I hadn't known at the beginning of the semester.

That startled me because it put in perspective two things about me. One, I didn't make an effort to get to know these people. And two, I really am a loner. I learned something about myself I'm not sure I liked. I'm still trying to figure out how to handle that.